Captain Colon, Bull's Head, Ashford in the water
It would be no exaggeration to say that the glitterati of Sheffield Hashing were out in force on this frosty but thankfully dry evening; Hash Elders, Hathersagers, Ex Patriots, Siblings, Hubbies, No Namers, Habadashers, OMM Jacket wearers, the whole ensemble made an appearance to form a cast of roughly 21 + Monty. Furthermore we were treated to a Hash set by Captain Colon, his new recruit Nigel and Pippa, who sadly missed the after party in the Bull’s Head.
Ashford on the Water had not seen so many visitors since records began, especially in monsoon season, there was even talk of tourist office being established. But for now let’s concentrate on the run.
‘Tonight’s Hash is a relatively easy run of about 9km’ forewarned Captain Colon, mmm…no one really fell for it and within a few strides we had come across a CB or B2C or whatever it was, frontrunners returned with wry smiles on their faces. On to CB so to speak, fool me once shame on you, fool me twice…Then there was a third, will the front runners ever learn?
Monty and Monty’s Batman caught up around this point, first of the surprise arrivals. From there we legged it pretty much unhindered towards the Monsal trail, where it would surely be one way or t’other and of course it was t’other. Just as we were beginning to despair about the amount of checking required who should appear but our bare legged warrior from Norway, Skidmarks! He made some excuse about having to be back for work, but we all knew that he had missed us so much that he had hopped on a flight at the first opportunity.
CC cleverly took us off the Monsal trail then doubled back and took us over the trail again and north towards Grand Longst’n, as the locals don’t call it. We messed about in the suburbs for a bit, checking in all directions, Mincer finally lead us past the road workers who were fixing a gas main, the smell of gas was particularly pungent and there ensued a struggle as to who could get furthest away and fastest.
Where should we go now? Back to the Monsal Trail of course! Monty searched desperately for a stick and someone to play the game of throw me the stick and I’ll just keep hold of it for the rest of the evening. Some serious jogging took place on this stretch of the trail and Hashers of all abilities secretly begged for a check and a chance to chat.
Soon enough one appeared and we were on on up the hill, another fairly long stretch of plodding took place until we reached the highest point on the trail. Soon enough the magic HR letters appeared and we gathered around to share the Jelly Babies - Captain Morgan was thrilled! The night was clear and many heads turned towards the stars, there was some confusion as to whether the stars would be more easily seen if we turned off our head torches or kept deathly silent, we did both to be sure. Dubious claims of seeing shooting stars were abound, there was also some p**s taking of the brave souls who had entered the Boston Mountain Marathon, oh how I miss the supportive crowd of the park run!
As Hypothermia began to set in, a collective decision was taken to set off or be forever left on the hill like the cast of Frozen, so on on up we went and over the peak. We eventually hit the treeline and followed a precarious hilly path that ran alongside Bakewell Industrial zone which, for trivia’s sake, included Thornbridge brewery. The woods, led to the mud, which led to the hill*, which lead to the dreaded farm.
*Where the bloody hell did he find that muddy, waterfall like hill?
We had been given instructions to bunch up before the farm, turn the head torches off and tip toe through. We bunched up to some extent and discussed for a while the best way to approach this potential trespass (there was a public footpath and gate through the farm - fact). In true hash honour we decided to leave the stragglers and send those who were there through. Head torches off we began the tiptoe, the cows began to shuffle in their barn, one even mooed, we were halfway there. In what can only be described as the observation of the evening, possibly the 2019 Hash series, Skidmarks remarked that it was the tidiest farm he had ever seen. There was even some admiration from Uglyman for the neatly stacked Timber, 10 out of 10 for house keeping!
Anyway back to the avoidance of the farmer, we could see the gate and an ‘every person for themselves’ mentality kicked in. Most worrying was the mobile home which could have contained armed guards. As it turned out it was just an empty mobile home parked up. As we made it through the gate head torches began to re illuminate and a steady stream of hashers began plodding across the field. Special mention to Ali Bongo who had the best tiptoeing skills and obvious experience of this kind of special operation.
At the end of the road there was a sharp right back towards home and soon enough we were stripping in the streets, readying ourselves for the pub. We fair filled the place and surrounded a triumphant Captain Colon and Nigel to congratulate them on a Hash well set.
Questions were asked about outfits for the Christmas do but little information was traded.
Further orders for Hash Shirts were given and subsequently further transactions on Monzo will need to be made.
In a break from tradition there was talk of an unsanctioned Hash on the 23rd of December, so far we have a hare and a hasher, so any others welcome!
Otherwise, one could almost hear the jingle bells of the Christmas Hash in the air!
On On,
Sticky Shaft
PS Regarding the run reports, if anyone would like to take a turn to write one, then please just give me a nudge after the run on Monday, I am more than happy to give my writing ‘skills’ a rest when the opportunity arises.
Otherwise if anyone has pictures or anecdotes that they would like to be weaved into the report then please send a message to the appointed writer for that week on whatsapp.
We had been given instructions to bunch up before the farm, turn the head torches off and tip toe through. We bunched up to some extent and discussed for a while the best way to approach this potential trespass (there was a public footpath and gate through the farm - fact). In true hash honour we decided to leave the stragglers and send those who were there through. Head torches off we began the tiptoe, the cows began to shuffle in their barn, one even mooed, we were halfway there. In what can only be described as the observation of the evening, possibly the 2019 Hash series, Skidmarks remarked that it was the tidiest farm he had ever seen. There was even some admiration from Uglyman for the neatly stacked Timber, 10 out of 10 for house keeping!
Anyway back to the avoidance of the farmer, we could see the gate and an ‘every person for themselves’ mentality kicked in. Most worrying was the mobile home which could have contained armed guards. As it turned out it was just an empty mobile home parked up. As we made it through the gate head torches began to re illuminate and a steady stream of hashers began plodding across the field. Special mention to Ali Bongo who had the best tiptoeing skills and obvious experience of this kind of special operation.
At the end of the road there was a sharp right back towards home and soon enough we were stripping in the streets, readying ourselves for the pub. We fair filled the place and surrounded a triumphant Captain Colon and Nigel to congratulate them on a Hash well set.
Questions were asked about outfits for the Christmas do but little information was traded.
Further orders for Hash Shirts were given and subsequently further transactions on Monzo will need to be made.
In a break from tradition there was talk of an unsanctioned Hash on the 23rd of December, so far we have a hare and a hasher, so any others welcome!
Otherwise, one could almost hear the jingle bells of the Christmas Hash in the air!
On On,
Sticky Shaft
PS Regarding the run reports, if anyone would like to take a turn to write one, then please just give me a nudge after the run on Monday, I am more than happy to give my writing ‘skills’ a rest when the opportunity arises.
Otherwise if anyone has pictures or anecdotes that they would like to be weaved into the report then please send a message to the appointed writer for that week on whatsapp.
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